Oh God

This past week was the first week of the rest of my life. My new place of employment has a strict no internet policy. I can safely use about 15 minutes a day without too much recourse. Living life without google at my finger tips is a life that’s just not worth living.

I spent the day working out the formula for a series of standard deviations to be put into about 50 excel spread sheets with six categories on each sheet. Seriously, throw some numbers at me and I can hit you with the 3-sigma pretty quickly. I have high hopes for this job. I also have high hopes that I will suddenly become independently wealthy. Too much?

Today I realized that I can now share some of the fun things from my old job. Like the time I had to fire an employee. This crazy mother fucker does the big nasty of healthcare and violates a patient’s confidentiality. I over-hear the whole shebang and report him. This was not exactly our star employee and after many years of write-ups and warnings this was the straw that broke the camel’s back. And speaking of camels, this employee once came in dressed for Halloween as an Arab. Yeah. He wrapped his head in a white cloth with a black band around his head and called himself an Arab. And it seriously took three more years to can his ass. Good times.

Some how I don’t think they dress up for Halloween at my new place of employment. Maybe that’s for the best.

Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on 09/14 at 06:12 PM

NO GOOGLE!?!?!? ERK!!

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Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)  on  12/29  at  12:09 PM
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