Must
08/30/2006
I was told (a long time ago, must have been a year gone by now, there is a post dead and buried) that I was hard to read. As I deleted some old emails today I realized that I must not be any easier than before the now.
I don’t share anything more revealing or dealing unless I must. Point blank questions with a blank fired at will. I still have walls, rebar reinforced steel embedded in concrete. Discreet.
The yap yap yap as I must smile and share the details that are nothing in a world full of nothing make people feel as if they made it. They are in the inner sanctum. Ground sanctified via dry tear ducts. The sacrosanct live here now. They must.
Being told I wasn’t what I said I was made me pull up quick. You must be wrong. You must not understand. Yes, that is the answer. It’s not me, it’s you. It must always be you. You. You. You.
I know the truth, which must be here somewhere, thinly veiled in a veil of words. A shit storm of words. That must be what I’ve got.
Feint of hand, distract if I must, reflect it back to you. She’ll be coming around the bend and blacken your eye. The surprise must be palpable.
The end will be the same. It must.
Next entry: Breaking up is hard to do
Previous entry: home soon
Not to be trite, but the bigger they are…
You know the rest.
I keep my secrets, but generally they only involve other people…and are kept for those people alone. I learned long ago that secrets breed many other things and I do my best to never keep them from myself.