Happy birthday baby: the scorched earth post, nothing will grow here again.
Happy birthday baby: the scorched earth post, nothing will grow here again.
I am not vindictive (although my sister may disagree) but when I feel betrayed I use every weapon at my disposal to eviscerate the offending party. My weapons are my words. I plant them just so. They deliver a blow, they maximize the carnage, they cut deep, and they draw blood.
I do not revel in the devastation, but I require the emotional harmonizing that the verbal purge facilitates.
In the past I have always striven to the highest level of excellence when it come to protecting the names of the innocent. Unfortunately, the innocent is no longer such.
So regarding OOG, who we’ll now call SimplyGreg because that’s his name (this line was written by a fellow blogger)...that’s right, I fucked a blogger, it turns out that he’s a bit of a fucker. No, not that way. I mean literally fucking his way around the American Southwest.
Well, welcome to your birthday baby, I’ve got something sweet for you in this here post. I thought that the best way to honor you, on this, your day of birth, would be to show everyone all the pretty words you used (about me and your girlfriend). I really hope no one who knows you (and your girlfriend) reads this (no, I don’t). I hear that you and she are moving in together, that’s nice. Good luck with that, I think you may find it difficult to continue sleeping with other women (I know I was not the only one) when she lives with you.
And what better way to kick it off, than the first quote about your girlfriend:
Dated June 30:
Exhibit A
Dated July 15:
Exhibit B
Dated July 18:
Exhibit C
Dated July 18:
Exhibit D
Dated July 18: (This is me writing back to him)
Exhibit E
I also saved our IMs. I wonder if I knew that there would come a day…but before that, side note.
This here is another sign that I should have heeded. He still is active in his Internet dating site profiles, both of them. He told me that he just liked to get the occasional email from girls looking to meet him. He said he liked the ego boost. If you’re really nice, I’ll email you the screen names (act quick, I’m sure they’ll be gone soon). Oh, life is good.
On to the IMs:
Dated July 27:
Some girl says:
I just am wondering, are you telling your girlfriend that I am coming out? I know that we talk about having sex, but would be okay actually having sex with me with her wherever she is? And would you tell her? You said in an email that you weren’t sure if you could fall in love with her, but still, you must feel something for her, right?
simplygreg says:
How do I answer this without sounding like a complete asshole
Some girl says:
you don’t
simplygreg says:
No, she doesn’t know, and she won’t know. The reason why I am even letting us get here is because I feel something special and I wouldn’t feel any resolution unless I found out what you and I are all about. I am not requiring sex. If it is a problem or a hassle or will create pain or drama then I don’t want it. What I want is to find out who you are and see what we are together…
simplygreg says:
for just a brief amount of time. I do feel strongly for her and it may develop into something bigger. And I feel bad for the deception, but I also need to know what the story is for my own peace of mind.
This is an interesting tidbit: seems that simplysomeass started an affair with a married woman (why was I so blind) and his perspective on this was the only person responsible was the woman who was having the affair. To wit:
Dated July 28:
simplygreg says:
I don’t have any protection mechanism for my heart. It just has to learn to deal.
Some girl says:
but don’t you feel like if someone is married it’s not your place to be in their lives like that?
simplygreg says:
of course. but honestly, that is there issue, not mine. I know that sounds shitty and like a cop out, but I am not the morality police for anyones relationship.
simplygreg says:
Saying that, I never did it, nor would I ever. It’s not how I am wired.
Some girl says:
while you were married?
simplygreg says:
yeah, while I was married. I never cheated
Some girl says:
don’t take this the wrong way, but so what. you’re not suppose to cheat when you’re married.
simplygreg says:
that is what I am saying. I agree. But you asked me whether I should have made that determination for her.
Some girl says:
no, I was asking if you were going to make that determination for yourself
simplygreg says:
to not get involved with a married girl because she is married?
Some girl says:
right
simplygreg says:
i’m confused as to your question
simplygreg says:
from a moral standpoint or in order to protect myself because I know what the result will be?
Some girl says:
what’s to be confused about? turn it around, you were married, right?
Some girl says:
did she cheat on you?
simplygreg says:
no
Some girl says:
if she had, what would you have felt
simplygreg says:
awful
Some girl says:
right, now you are getting involved in someone else’s relationship because it’s what you want to do
Some girl says:
but a married in which you are not a part has nothing to do with what you want to do
simplygreg says:
and what she wants to do. and it is her relationship
simplygreg says:
not mine.
Some girl says:
and regardless what ever peace she has to make, recognize that your actions are affecting his life
simplygreg says:
I am not responsible for her conduct in her relationship
simplygreg says:
no, her actions are
Some girl says:
that’s a really selfish way of thinking
Some girl says:
your actions are just as responsible, and in the eyes of the law you are equally responsible for the outcome
Some girl says:
women are suing the other woman for loss of affect and winning
simplygreg says:
So it is my responsibility to remind a married woman who wants to fuck that she shouldn’t because it will hurt her husband?
Some girl says:
no, your responsibility is to remember that we’re all sharing this earth and we need to take care of each other, whether or not you want to fuck a married woman or not
simplygreg says:
true. I am not saying it was moral, or that I am even moral or that it was right. I am saying it was what it was. I harbor no guilt.
simplygreg says:
But I honestly think you are wrong in shifting the burden of responsibility to the person who has no commitment or obligation
I can look back and confidently say that I am holding absolutely no burden or feeling no guilt for what I’ve done, after all, I have no commitment or obligation.
Let’s continue on, shall we.
Dated July 29:
simplygreg says:
Let’s be clear. I have not developed a relationship with any other bloggers like I have with you. For some reason, there are a few that are flirting with me, but that’s where that ends. Some chicks just seem to like self-deprecating verbose men in desperate need of an editor. It is flattering, yes. But that’s it.
And here is where I start to whimper and need a drink, this is the beginning of the point where I want to throw something at him and scream liar.
What the hell is wrong with me?
And back to some emails (this is kind of fun and epic, please keep reading and help my catharsis move along). I posted this a while ago from September 28 (I can’t believe I just linked to myself).
Dated September 16:
Exhibit F
Dated September 27:
Exhibit G
There was more, so much more, but in the end, I can’t do it, I can’t post the rest.
I pulled out these pieces to complete my journey. I am sharing this with others because I know it will help at least one person be stronger. I am sharing this with my readers so I can finally stop having this shit in my life. I am sharing this with the Internet at large in an attempt to stand up and say that I matter and I deserved so much more than this.
I spent hours reading our minute, the boring details of our affair. The crux of this was twelve pages long and I hadn’t really gotten anywhere. I was spiraling downward with no way to stop. I can’t rehash something that no longer matters (I tried, I really did) but now, as I envelope myself in the words from this summer, I think: Three months ago I felt for this man, two months ago he broke my faith, one month ago I learned that he didn’t want anything to do with me (for the sake of his own comfort) and last night I learned that he’s a repeat offender.
So, I will not post the rest of the words he wrote me, I figure what is here is enough to satisfy me. I will not find pleasure in exposing him for what he is (failing as a human being is so difficult and he makes it look so easy) but I will call him by his name, he no longer has the right to anonymity. Innocence is by standing no longer.
Greg, simply, I hope you have a sweet birthday and have a chance to reflect on all the dirt with which you must live (if you need copies of the IMs or emails, let me know, I would be more than happy to share them).
Love and kisses,
Some Girl (I certainly am)